CORRECTNESS:Conciseness, Conciseness Checklist, Correct words

<< PRINCIPLES OF BUSINESS COMMUNICATION:Clarity

CONSIDERATION:Completeness >>

Lesson 10

CORRECTNESS

The correctness principle is more than proper grammar, punctuation and spelling.

A message may be perfect grammatically mechanically but still lose a customer and fail to achieve a

purpose. Though mistakes are never intentional, they spoil our image. Errors in the messages fall in

the following categories:

Mistakes in names, figures, facts, and words.

Mistakes in punctuation and capitalization

Mistakes in the level of Language

Mistakes in names, figures, facts, and words

· Any mistakes in names, figures, facts, etc, can make your message unclear. Such mistakes can also

create problems for you. Imagine if you write 2000 where you were supposed to write 200.

· Mistakes in punctuation and capitalization must be avoided.

· So be careful to:

· Verify your statistical data.

· Double-check your totals.

· Avoid guessing at laws that have an Impact on you and your receiver.

Mistakes in the level of Language

· There are two types of writings: formal and informal. In formal writing, our style is

unconversational. In informal writing, we use words that are short, familiar and

conversational.

· A formal style is characterized by more complex sentences.

· An informal style is characterized by Short words and sentences

(Thanks a lot for your letter).

· Contraction & Abbreviations (I haven't, there's) simple words.

Correctness:

At the core of correctness is proper

· Grammar

· Punctuation

· Spelling

The term correctness applied to business messages also means the following characteristics.

·Use the right level of language

·Check accuracy of figures, facts and words

·Maintain acceptable writing mechanics

The term correctness applied to business messages also means the following characteristics.

·Use the right level of language

·Check accuracy of figures, facts and words

·Maintain acceptable writing mechanics

Formal Writing

Formal writing is often associated with scholarly writing.

Examples

doctoral dissertations, scholarly articles, top-level government agreements etc

The style unconventional, usually impersonal, and contains long and involved sentences.

Informal Writing

This style of writing is more characteristic in business writing.

An example is the communications via E-mail, memos etc.

Reminder:

· Avoid substandard language.

· Using incorrect words, incorrect grammars, faulty pronunciation all suggest inability to use good English.

Check accuracy of figures, facts and words

· It is impossible to convey the meaning of the words precisely, through words, from the head of

the sender to the receiver.

· Our goal is to be as precise as possible.

A good check of data is to have another person read and comment on the validity of the material.

Figures and Facts

· Verify your statistical data.

· Double check your totals.

· Avoid guessing at Laws that have an impact on you.

Continued....

· Have someone else read your message if the topic involves data.

· Determine whether a fact has changed overtime.

Words that confuse

English language is constantly changing.

Though dictionaries cannot keep up with rapid change, but still are the most useful resource for

finding correct words.

Example:

a, an

Use a before consonant and consonant sounds or a long a sound. Use an before

vowels or silent h sounds.

Example

accept, except

Accept is a verb that means receive.

Except is a verb that relates to omitting out or leaving out.

Example:

Between, Among

Between involves two people, among, three or more.

Example:

Farther, further

Farther is used to express more distance in space, further for distance in time, quality or

degree.

Example:

Biannually, biennially

Biannually mean two time a year, biennially means every two years.

Maintain Acceptable Writing Mechanics

All material relating to mechanics, word processing and appearance is relevant here.

A careful attention to the mechanical part of every well-written document.

Conciseness

Eliminate wordy expressions

· To avoid wordy expressions, use single words whenever possible. Here are some examples of how

word economy saves the reader's time and effort.

· Wordy: I want to take this opportunity to tell you that we are grateful to you

· Concise:

Thank you

· Wordy: We are grateful and appreciative

· Concise:

We look forward with anticipation to...

· Avoid trite, "which" that clauses whenever possible

· We wan to buy chairs which are of the executive types

· We want to buy executive type chairs

Include only relevant material

· Your reader will lose interest in your message if he/she finds irrelevant things in your message.

Using only well-chosen words can help you convey relevant facts.

· Avoid, information obvious to the reader

· Avoid long introduction, excessive adjectives, pompous works

Conciseness

Avoid unnecessary repetition.

· Avoid repetition by using pronouns, short names or acronyms, etc.

· Stick to the purpose of the message.

· Writing concisely means using only necessary, meaningful words.

Conciseness is saying what you want to say in the fewest possible words without sacrificing the

other C qualities.

· A concise message saves time and expense for both the sender and the receiver.

·· It increases emphasis in the message.

·· It shows respect for the recipient, by not cluttering them unnecessary information.

To achieve conciseness, observe the following suggestions.

· Eliminate wordy expressions

· Include only relevant material

· Avoid unnecessary repetition

Eliminate wordy expressions

Use single-word substitutes instead of phrases whenever possible without changing meaning.

Wordy : At this time

Concise : Now

Wordy : Due to the fact that

Concise : because

Use single-word substitutes instead of phrases whenever possible without changing meaning.

Wordy : have need for

Concise : Need

Wordy : In due course

Concise : Soon

Omit trite, unnecessary expressions

Wordy : Please be advised that your admission statement has been received.

Concise : Your admission statement has been received.

Replace wordy conventional statements with concise ones.

Wordy : Please find attached the list you requested.

Concise : The list you requested is attached.

Replace wordy conventional statements with concise ones.

Wordy : Such refreshing comments are few and far between.

Concise : Such refreshing comments are scarce.

Avoid overusing empty phrases.

Wordy : There are four rules that should be observed.

Concise : Four rules must be observed.

Avoid overusing empty phrases.

Wordy : It was known by Mr.. Usman that we must reduce size our inventory.

Concise : Mr.. Usman knew we must reduce our inventory.

Omit "which" and "that" clause where ever possible.

Wordy : She bought desks that are of the executive type.

Concise : She bought executive type desks.

Omit "which" and "that" clause where ever possible.

Wordy : The receipt that is enclosed documents your purchase.

Concise : The enclosed receipt documents your purchase.

Eliminate unnecessary prepositional phrase.

Wordy : The issue of most relevance is teamwork.

Concise : The most relevant issue is teamwork.

Eliminate unnecessary prepositional phrase.

Wordy : In most cases the date of the inquiry is indicated in the upper right corner.

Concise : The policy date is in the upper right corner.

Limit your passive voice.

Wordy : The total balance due will be found on Page 2 of this report.

Concise : The balance due is on page 2 of this report.

Limit your passive voice.

Wordy : The reports are to be submitted by employees prior to 5:00 p.m.; at which

time they

will be received by Ali.

Concise : Please submit your reports to Ali by 5:00 p.m.

Include only relevant material

Stick to the purpose of the message.

Delete irrelevant words and rambling sentences.

Omit information obvious to the reader.

Avoid long introductions, unnecessary explanations, pompous words and gushy

politeness.

Get to the important point tactfully and concisely.

Example:

Wordy : We hereby wish to let you know that our company is pleased with

the confidence

you have reposed in us.

Concise : We appreciate your confidence.

Avoid unnecessary Repetition

Unnecessary repetition leads to dullness.

Use short names when you have mentioned the long one once. For Shaukat Khanum Memorial

Cancer Hospital, use Shaukat Khanum or simply the Hospital.

Use initials instead of repeating long names. Instead of using Pakistan

International Airlines, use PIA.

Cut out needless repetition of phrases or sentences.

Sometimes it is possible to combine two or even three sentences using

subordinate clauses or phrases.

Example:

·The following letter is from a business executive in a Company for 5 years

Will you ship us some time, anytime during the month of October would be fine, or even

November if you are rushed (November would suit us just as well, in fact a little bit better) 300 of

the regular Dell Computers.

Thank you in advance for sending these along in parcel post, and not in express, as express

is too expensive.

Concise Version of the Letter:

Please ship parcel post, before the end of November 300 Dell Computers.

Conciseness Checklist:

·Use one word in in place of phrases; one sentence in place of two. Read out loud to listen for

wordiness.

·Omit outdated trite expressions.

·Ask yourself: what material is really relevant?

·Look for unnecessary repetition: Does the same word or idea appear too often ?

Recognizing incorrect words

1. Simple words. Rewrite the following sentences, substituting simple words for the underlined

words and phrases in the sentences

A conference call will afford us an opportunity to interrogate the numerous remuneration

proposals and consummate the rumors.

2. Concise words. Delete the extra words and rewrite these sentences.

I want to take this opportunity to thank you for arranging to send me a computer that is

exactly identical to the one in my office. This letter is to acknowledge receipt of and thank you

for your check no 389939 in the amount of Rs. 1000.

3. We have 30 reservations at the present writing, so I am taking the liberty of sending you an

updated list.

4. Correct words. Substitute correct words for the underlined words that are incorrect.

Between you and I she has a long ways to go to be a realator. Irregardless of the person which

you select, I am real pleased with the candidates. I don't have but two pair of shoes.

Hi / Dear Mr Imran

Thanks / thank you for your recent letter. We were happy / pleased to hear that you are interest in

marketing our range of children garments

But/however, before we make any firm decision make up our mind, we would be grateful if you

would provide us with / give us further information concerning / about the organization of your

firm, the territory it covers, the number of retail outlets and your market share.

You would have to get us / we would expect a minimum turnover of 600,000 before being in a

position to / we could offer you a agency. We would want to get / we would wish to achieve a

market share of at least 10% in the first two years.

Anyway/ this said, if you feel your firm is able to meet these targets it would be nice / it would be

useful to arrange an appointment to have a chat about / discuss the project in a bit more detail

further.

I will be in English from 5 12 May and suggest we meet / get together then, if this is convenient

/OK.

Please confirm with my secretary if this is all right / satisfactory.

I look forward to hearing from you in the near future / hope to get a letter from you soon.

Yours sincerely, /All the best

Asif

Courtesy

Courtesy does not mean the use of old-fashioned expressions such as `your kind enquiry', `thank

you' and `please'. Rather, it is politeness that grows out of respect and concern for others. Courtesy

is a quality that enables a request to be refused without killing all hope of future business. Courtesy

also means replying promptly to all letters. If you feel your correspondent's comments are unfair,

try to answer tactfully. In short, the whole letter should have a courteous tone. It is not what you

say, it is how you say it.

The following are suggestions for producing a courteous tone:

Be sincerely tactful, thoughtful, and appreciative

Use expressions that show respect

Choose nondiscriminatory expressions

Courtesy

Be sincerely tactful, thoughtful, and appreciative

· Sometimes you have to deal with unpleasant messages. Always remember that by using tact and

being thoughtful you can convey anything, however unpleasant it may be, to your readers.

· We have believe that the extent of your current obligations makes you a bad credit risk.

· Our credit department believes that, because of your current obligations additional credit might be

difficult for you to handle at this time.

Use expressions that show respect

· Expressions like, `irresponsible' or `I do not agree with' etc., are annoying. Use expressions that

show respect for your reader and help him think positively about your message.

Courtesy

Choose nondiscriminatory expressions

· Courtesy also requires use of nondiscriminatory expressions that refer to any particular, gender,

race, ethnic. origin, etc.

Instead of these gender-specific words. Choose these Bias Free words

Businessman

Business person or business worker

Chairman

Chair, chairperson, worker, employee

Manpower

Worker, employee

Newsman

Newscaster or reporter or journalist

Salesman

Salesperson, sales, representative, agent

Courtesy

Singular Pronoun

Him

Each customer will be notified his bill Customers will be notified on their bills

(rewarded into the plural)

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