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Theory and Practice of Counseling - PSY632

Lesson 15

LISTENING & UNDERSTANDING SKILLS

Following is the list of important listening and understanding skills:

· Possess an Attitude of Respect & Acceptance

· Tune into the Client's Internal Viewpoint

· Opening remarks

· Open questions

· Paraphrasing

· Reflection of feeling

· Summarization

In the previous lecture, we discussed the following listening and understanding skills:

· Possess an Attitude of Respect & Acceptance

· Tune into the Client's Internal Viewpoint

· Opening remarks

Asking Questions: Open Questions

Questions have large range of purposes and applications, as described below:

· to initiate interview

· to facilitate communication

· to motivate self-disclosure

· used to elaborate on a topic

· used to shift from one topic to another

· can enhance the client's awareness

· help making diagnosis

· Used to guide the client.

Before discussing open questions, let's talk about different types of questions and their difference from

open questions.

Suggestive Questions

· Give hidden (or not so hidden) advice disguised as a question.

· Tend to start with stems such as "Don't you think...?" "Could you...?" "Have you ever

(considered)...?

· Suggestive openers. Sometime the counselor is not even aware that he is giving advice. He must listen

with a third ear whether the question is giving advice.

· The counselor may think that the question just motivates the client. But these questions may be just like

putting answers into clients' mouths.

Example:

Counselor: Have you ever tried talking to your father about your husband's behavior?

Client: No I haven't. Should I?

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Theory and Practice of Counseling - PSY632

Assumptive Questions

They give the client the impression that the counselor expects a particular answer. In other words they

are not questions at all; the statements in fact are disguised as questions. The client has to decide

whether to decide himself or comply with the assumption.

· They start with stems like "But you have (haven't)...?" "Do you really...?" "Isn't it?" or "Do (don't)

you....?"

Example:

· Counselor: But you aren't taking drugs yourself?

· Client: Not really..... (looks away)

Leading question: She's a great person, isn't she?

Open-ended question: What do you think about her?

Judgmental Questions

· Such questions put the client on the defensive or create discomfort.

· One prime example of a question that will sound judgmental to almost anyone is the still-often-used

"why did you do that?" It could be better phrased as: "How did you decide what to do at that point?"

· Judgmental questions are the reason why questions starting with "why" have fallen into disregard

among counselors.

· A generalization has occurred that all questions starting with why are judgmental, while this is not the

case. Occasional well-planned "why" questions can be quite appropriate.

· It is best to eliminate from a counselor's vocabulary as most clients would react defensively. There are

many better ways to arrive at the same point.

Attacking Questions

· These are Similar or closely related to judgmental questions. However, the attacking questions are more

obvious and hence more easily avoided.

· Serve to shame the client or demonstrates the counselor's power over the client. This type of inquiry is

perceived by the client as demeaning or embarrassing.

· Regardless of the intention of the counselor, attacking questions serve to shame the client or

demonstrates the counselor's power over the client. It must be eradicated from the counselor's

repertoire of questions.

· Examples:

"Why are you telling me that?"

"What is the point of this story?"

"Aren't you listening to me?"

"Is that supposed to make sense?"

"Can't you understand this simple idea?" etc.

Controlling or Intrusive Questions

· These questions ignore the client's agenda and needs, and focuses instead on the desires and wishes of

the counselor. There are of course times when counselor appropriately changes the agenda or direction

for the sake of the client (e.g., when the client is not on a productive course), but these are for some

personal need.

· This can happen due to two reasons:

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Theory and Practice of Counseling - PSY632

The counselor is not comfortable with the conversation, e.g., about authority figures, divorce,

men, women, sex, etc.

The counselor seeks specific details and the focus shifts to a preoccupation of the counselor,

e.g., asking too many intrusive questions about client's sex life.

Pitfalls of Such Questions

The counselor may be perceived as controlling the conversation.

The counselor may block clients from getting in touch with and listening to themselves and responding

to their internal viewpoint rather than to your external viewpoint

The counselor may set the stage for an interrogation

Closed Questions

Closed-ended questions curtail speaker's options. Allow the client to answer with a simple phrase or

even to give a yes-no answer.

· Make easy for clients to evade issues and do not encourage self-disclosure.

Example:

o Closed-ended question: Is your relationship good or bad?

o Open-ended question: How do you feel about your relationship?

Pitfalls of Closed Questions:

The resulting interaction between counselor and client may not be very rich. Clients do not have to

provide a lot of information and the ensuing interaction between counselor and client may not be very

rich.

Counselors end up doing all of the therapeutic work for the client, who may has to sit and answer yes

or no. Closed questions require a lot of verbalization from the counselor, a practice that is not

conducive to collaborative communication.

A practice not conducive to collaborative communication. However, it does not imply that counselors

never use closed-ended questions. It depends on the goals of your listening. Closed-ended questions

can be useful for collecting information. However, show restraint if you wish to help others share their

worlds. On the other hand, you may also need sometime to use open-ended questions sparingly.

Purposeful Use of Closed Questions

During a crisis situation

When a client is self-disclosing too much too quickly

When a client is excessively anxious

When a client's thoughts are racing or who is overly talkative.

Shotgunning

· Overly relying on closed questions.

· Defined as series of closed questions that cover nothing in depth and much in breadth.

· The target client is likely to feel bombarded.

This kind of interview can go on like that for hours, unless the client gets fed up and leaves.

Open-Ended Questions

Open-ended questions allow clients to share their internal viewpoints without curtailing their options.

Everything leading up to this point has hinted at the importance of open-ended questions.

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Theory and Practice of Counseling - PSY632

Questions need to be intentional and purposeful. Questions have a purpose and should not be asked to

kill time and break silence.

Appropriate timing of the questions. It is critical that counselor leans to phrase good open-ended

questions.

Questions shall be perceived as supportive and therapeutic, not judgmental or presumptuous. The

client best not be interrupted, but it is also not good to wait too long to ask a question as the client may

move to another topic.

Function

· Used to bring out major data and facilitate conversation A good use of open-ended questions is when,

in the initial session, you wish to assist clients to tell why they have come.

· If counselors follow few basic rules of open-ended questions, they should be quite successful in

soliciting information and facilitate self-disclosure.

Description:

The purpose of using different words used in asking open-ended questions is as under:

What (facts)

How (process or feelings)

Why (reasons)

Change from Closed- to Open-Ended Questions

Closed Questions

Open-Ended Questions

Do you like your mother?

How do you feel about your mother?

Do you have a best friend?

What can you tell me about your best friend?

Is your apartment new?

Tell me about the place where you live.

Were you

hospitalized

after

the How bad were your injuries?

accident?